You walk into a room and everybody starts staring at you. You try to find a reflective surface so that you can check whether you look okay. You can hear them murmuring amongst themselves and are sure that somebody just said your name. You can feel them looking at you as you fidget with your hair and clothes. You hear your name again and are certain that they are talking about you behind your back and laughing at you.

Does this or any version of it happen to you?

If your answer is yes, you probably have social anxiety/low confidence/self-esteem issues. Nothing to worry about, you can get over it.  These issues are mostly interconnected and once you are able to get to the root of the problem, you can start to fix it. Getting there would take some work though, and not everyone is willing to do that. Still, let me share a couple of incidents from my life with the hope that they help you.

When I was younger, I was very scared of dogs. I would avoid lanes near my house where the stray dogs would loiter and refused to enter anyone’s house till their pet dogs were locked in a room. Numerous people told me the same thing- they are more afraid of you then you are of them. It took me some time and experiments to wrap my head around that concept. But once I truly embraced that reality, I realized dogs were better company than humans.

I have had my struggles with social anxiety, I still do. Not thinking about anything and diving into situations head first helped me. I just applied the same principle- they are probably more conscious than I am. I know it is one thing to talk about such principles and another to follow them. It is not easy to follow through, but we have to start somewhere. Now keep in mind that what worked for me might not work for you or someone else. The same key doesn’t open all locks, you have to find yours.

“A very little key will open a very heavy door”- Charles Dickens.